Friday, December 5, 2008

The Call of the Blind Item

Am I the only person who is kind of obsessed with blind item gossip? In case you're unfamiliar, these are pieces of celebrity gossip where they don't come out and tell you who the celebrity involved is but they just drop some clues as to her identity. So it's kind of like a guessing game.

They usually go something like "This blonde actress on a hit TV show is hoping her husband doesn't find out that her costar is actually the father of the child she's six months pregnant with." I totally just made that one up, but pretty juicy right?

The guessing is totally half the fun. Also, maybe I've noticed that I tend to accept the veracity of the underlying gossip in a blind item more so than with other types of gossip. Maybe this is because by guessing I've played an active role in creating the information and thus I'm not viewing it through a critical eye. Or maybe I just tend to believe that most of the crap you read in gossip mags is probably true. Anyway, I don't think the pleasure in reading celebrity gossip really depends on whether it's true or not: sometimes it's just fun to think "oh, I can totally she her doing that!" or "oh, wouldn't that be awesome if that was true?"

Here's one blind item I read and particularly enjoyed a few weeks back. I read it on gawker but it originally comes from this site Crazy Days and Nights which is infamous for its poorly written and confusingly byzantine blind items.

"This foreign born B list film star who was shooting for A list before he started losing his hair and his box office mojo is apparently extremely sensitive about his hair. How much? Well, he was buying a suit a few weeks ago and the salesperson suggested a hat because he thought it would go well the suit. Our actor took it the wrong way though and took a good five minutes to yell at the offending salesperson before throwing the suit on the floor and kicking it around a little and then walking out the door."

The consensus among readers is that the "foreign born B list film star" who is losing his hair is Jude Law which I totally think is true. I can imagine him flipping out on the salesman and shouting and kicking the coat around in a very muppety fashion, and the image still brings a smile to my face. heheh.

So yeah, the blind items can be fun although I must say that after a while most of them start to sound the same like "blah blah who's gay blah blah who's doing drugs blah blah who's steppin' out" (I've decided I have to start using that phrase more).

This is kind of the juiciest one I've ever come across, but it's also sort of graphic so I was debating whether I should tarnish my blog with it (eh, what the heck). It was originally run on Page Six, the gossip feature in Rupert Murdoch's New York Post, on August 18, 2008.

"WHICH hunk in a summer movie is a violent, closeted homosexual? The heartthrob snuck into his ex's apartment a few months ago and raped him so violently, the ex ended up in the hospital—and the actor paid him $500,000 to keep his mouth shut."

Scandalous, right?! People couldn't really agree who this rumored gay rapist could be, but it seems like the choices would be Will Smith, Christian Bale, James Franco, Robert Downey Jr., and maybe Vin Diesel. Feel free to share your thoughts.


nola32 said...

ok so the first one is TOTALLY jude law. he's so blech. i used to think that he was kind of pretty (now i can't even remember why) but now i think he's just gross. not to mention that every single person i know who has seen him in person (which is about a million since he was here for so long shooting 'all the king's men', not to mention my elder brother stood in line behind him at the movies once in new york- my brother did say that he seemed really cool with his kids) says that he looks HORRIBLE in person. they ALL say that you can totally see his hair going, going... and that he's always greasy and has really bad skin (which i've also heard a lot from people who come face to acne-scarred face with brad pitt).
as far as the second one goes- i have NO clue but i really don't think that it's christian bale. not because i can't really see him as gay but because i totally see him as the kind of guy that if he were gay he would be out (have you ever seen 'velvet goldmine'? he's clearly not afraid of exploring his sexuality- at least not on film). as far as who it could be... i'm at a loss (for once!).

Meeg said...

I think I read that the item was supposed to be about James Franco. But also it's just a rumor and is probably not true.